Parenting is a life-long journey. I still call my parents for advice. In hard times, I still want my mom. It does not go away – no matter what your relationship with your kids today. As a parent, I dislike writing about parenting. It not a one-size-fits-all subject. I do not have all of the answers – or even most of them. There are days when I feel like I have it all together. Then there are the ones….well you know. The ones you never expected to be this hard. Before we had kids, we had expectations. Expectations of birth, baby life, toddler-life, teen-life, and well so many expectations of control. Then the baby comes. Open the window- toss out the expectations. You have lost all control. Call me when they turn 18. Here are a few expectations I have come to hang onto over the years: Making their own lunch gets them into college This started in First Grade. It was the last straw. Full lunchbox. Nothing is good to eat. I opened the lunch box and told him to take whatever he wanted to school. His eyes were so big. I surrendered that day. (Only to retreat and […]Read More
If you have been married for more than a day, you have experienced some relationship bumps. Unmet, unclear, unfair expectations perhaps? We expect things from our significant other. Even if we think we do not…there is a moment. Among many I speak to, it seems there are many expectations around loading the dishwasher, putting the toilet paper on the holder, and even what side of the bed you will sleep. I stopped ironing my husbands dress shirts early on because I apparently iron on the wrong side of the ironing board. Bless. There are people that can dry clean them. Boom problem solved. Expectations come from the lessons our past has taught us. The proper way…that only YOU know… like how to load the dishwasher. Any other way will not result in clean dishes. It is a convincing argument. But what happens when loading the dishwasher becomes a measure of how much your spouse loves you. How can expectations impact our marriage (or any relationship!)? E – Excuses. Do you use expectations of what should be, could be, or would be to justify your own actions? X – X-ray vision – We often judge our spouse by their actions […]Read More
This past week my son and I helped a friend move her daughter into her dorm at college. There I was stuck in the middle of living in the present, releasing the past, and planning for the future. My son has a few more years of high school but it really has made the clock seem to move forward at warp speed. I remember feeling a similar feeling when he first started Kindergarten. It’s too much, too fast. I will not let go. But time does move forward. Even if it feels like a jump to warp speed from a sci-fi movie, it is just life. Just life. Does not really help how we feel stuck in the middle of the circumstance does it? I am proud of my kids. They do well. They make mistakes, they misbehave, and generally are becoming productive members of society. So why do I want it all to slow down? I do not really want it to slow down. There was a moment that I could see spending the last few years of his high school career sad at everything. Oh do not mistake..there will be tears. There will be the “happy-sad” tears […]Read More
For the past year I have been in a season of transition. Without a permanent residence and my families belongings in storage it would be an easy season to be “stuck”. Have you ever found yourself in a season that you feel stuck? Not necessarily full depression, just a place you exist but not work to thrive. How can we look at events and moments in our life that could lead to a feeling of being “stuck”? I have found there are have been several opportunities in which I could have translated into reasons (excuses) to be stuck. It was often a fine line. A series of small daily choices I had to make to keep moving forward. Sometimes successfully – others not so much. Here are the top ten areas I find to give me the most temptation to derail my zest for life. Kids schedules Moving Family illness Job situation Health challenge Busyness of life Relationships Eating habits Sleep habits Change of seasons What is one thing you need to work to “unstick” this month? Let’s hear from you. Share with us on Facebook or in the comments. I would love to hear how we can keep moving, keep […]Read More
Rejection is hard. No one relishes the term “trial by fire”. Especially when you see your child burn up in the flame of rejection. Rejection is part of life. How can we fan the flame of our child’s gifting and passion without burning up in the sadness of the rejection? At five years old, my daughter jumped up on the stage with no fear belted out in song. On key, in sync with a music track, and in front of strangers at a mall. No training. At that moment I knew I was in for a journey like no other. Have you ever found yourself on a journey with your children not of your own design? Sometimes I wish I could orchestrate a safe, perfect activity with no disappointment or heartache. But then in reality I would only be doing that for my own ease. My daughter’s journey in theater and acting began on that stage when she was only five. I hesitate to share about it only because it is a harsh world for a child. They are exposed. Out in the open, giving their all with each and every audition. And the no’s are much more prevalent than […]Read More
My husband jokes all the time about the “mom mafia”. I do not think you really have to be a mom to be a part of this tribe. It is really a woman thing. A relationship thing. Whenever one of us experience a trial, hard-time, health issue, our women tribe move into action. There is food…..so much food. Of course there is also a listening ear, help with carpool, and general rally so no one is alone…but there is always enough food! I know I have amazing friends. It is hard not to feel it when you put yourself out there in this type of work. The women around me encourage me, challenge me, and are genuinely interested in how life is going. It is a two way street. I love celebrating the successes of my friends, big or small! Stay-at-home, work-at-home, traditional work – those labels do not matter. We thrive when we have a tribe of women surrounding us in all seasons of life. Never is that more true than when a trial hits. This past week I travelled back to my childhood home. Momma was in the midst. You go when it’s your momma. Right! Although, the […]Read More
Summertime. In the Pacific Northwest, July means summer begins. Let’s talk family. We come outside like ants to sugar seeking sun. Outdoor activities are crammed into what seems like a 30 day period so we can sustain the rest of the year in the rain. As we move into July we are on our 13 month of being in a “temporary apartment”. The best part, it is now the season we can actually use the pool. I love that part. When we moved into this apartment over a year ago, we intended it to be a short season. We do not mind being in an apartment it has actually taken our lifestyle down to a very minimalist living. Gone are the days of Costco bulk shopping. We are here in all our craziness. The issue has become that I did not plan for apartment size furniture in my choices of items we moved here versus what furniture we put in storage. We feel a bit closterphobic. For the past year, there is no escaping family. Everywhere you turn in the apartment, there someone will be sitting, playing, eating, working. We are everywhere. It has been an intense journey […]Read More
Have you ever faced a difficult situation in life and felt more judgement by others opinions than support? Watching a loved one suffer, friend or family member is a hard place to live. We often feel helpless so we give what comes natural – our opinion. Last week, I shared a post about loss. The loss of my uncle when I was 24 years old changed me, my life, and my family. Until that morning, suicide was a thing of the movies. I had not even considered it as a possibility among anyone I knew. I was wrong. When I walked into the house, my grandfather sat slumped over the kitchen table with his face in his hands. The patriarch of our family sat sobbing, deep guttural sobs. Simply saying, “why didn’t he tell me, I could have helped him?” From the phone call, to the five hour drive to get to my aunt there were not many words – just disbelief. In my mind, I kept thinking I would wake up. I left my life that day on the floor. Swept away in a sea of emotions, grief, and naivety, my former self was no longer. Dramatic? Ask anyone […]Read More
It took me awhile before I realized the screams I was hearing were my own. When I came out of my dream-like state, my co-worker friends were shaking me and asking me loudly to focus on them. I was standing in a conference room down the hall from my desk. The last thing I remember was picking up the phone. The fifteen minutes I do not remember that day was not the only thing I lost. Both are gone forever. My story is not uncommon. It is just not to be spoken. Those fifteen minutes I lost, it has taken 20 years for me to share them. I will share them with you this month. May was Mental Health awareness month. I can not speak to what it is to suffer from mental illness. It is not my story to tell. What I will share in this next two weeks is hard. It is not what many people want to hear. There are so many that need our love. Fierce love. Unconditional love. Will you join me on this next journey? Join me as I share what it is like to walk along side someone with a mental illness. The […]Read More
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Embrace the Crazy is about networking women together with those that are living life to the fullest with ALL their crazy. It's not a pit stop, a when I arrive or a when I get thru this...but a path to always taking the next step to living life as it is intended... in relationship with others to complement, equip, and encourage and not to compete.